Justin is a 29 year-old who lives with his 73 year-old dad. As with most dads, his dad exudes the wisdom of old sages – except that they’re so powerfully packed with sarcasm and humor that he’s got over 800,000 following his hilarious one-liners.

Some recent gems include:

• “Happy birthday, I didn’t get you a present…Oh, mom got you one? Well, that’s from me then too, unless it’s shitty.”
• “Son, no one gives a shit about all the things your cell phone does. You didn’t invent it, you just bought it. Anybody can do that.”
• “Oh please, you practically invented lazy. People should have to call you and ask for the rights to lazy before they use it.”
• “The baby will talk when he talks, relax. It ain’t like he knows the cure for cancer and he just ain’t spitting it out.”

Read more at http://twitter.com/shitmydadsays.